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  • Lynn Kim Do

    Lynn Kim Do

    there's nothing to hide and no one to hide from, especially yourself











    If life is a serious of decisions, then I’m going to jump the gun and say that there are going to be moments when the socially right thing to do is absolutely not what you feel like doing. Scratch that. You’re going to experience it all the time. Or maybe I just do. And the older I get, I assumed that it would be easier to decide which route to take. Reality is – it doesn’t. I’ve grown cocky with my decision making skills, generally following my 68% “whatever the fuck I feel” and 32% “not my battle today” ratio. I get cocky in who I am, making it harder to be open to saying the right things to say in efforts of comfort as oppose to just saying how I really feel.

    Here are some things I would much rather say in many conversational occasions:

    1. “Wow, I really don’t care about anything that is coming out of your mouth.”We’ve all been here. I don’t know how many times I’ve been in a situation where my boss pimps me out to new potential business and I have to sit there and act like I care about what they think about the weather, their favorite shitty restaurant in NYC, what their dog looks like after the 2nd blurry photo, and pretty much anything else. 
    2. “Fuck, what’s your name again?”I suck at remembering names. And it bothers the hell out of me. 7 out of 10 times, I’m trying to rack my brain for your name while you’re telling me about that one time you ran into Rita Ora in Soho. 
    3. “I would rather eat my own feces than follow you.”Do NOT grab my phone and enter your handle and then proceed to press the follow button without exchanging more than 5 words with me first. You IG whore.
    4. “Ha, that’s funny that you think we’re going to be friends.”We have zero in common. I know you don’t like me. Don’t pretend to be my friend. And let’s just not pretend to be nice to one another either. In fact, let’s Kill Bill this bitch.
    5. “No. The answer is no.”Why is it so hard to just say NO sometimes! Like no, I don’t ever want to do brunch with you. No, I don’t want to talk to that ugly dude so you can talk to his friend. No, I don’t want this kale salad but I’m going to eat it anyway. NO!
    6. “I’m going to laugh to make you feel better but I just want to turn my ass around and walk away.”Keep your day job. You won’t succeed in improv.
    7. “What exactly do you want from me?”Let’s cut to the chase. Why are you talking to me? What exactly do you think will benefit you in our exchange? And…how do you want to use me? Bitch. 
    8. “I hate this”small talk thing we'e trying to do. 
    9. “You’re racist.”No, I am not Chinese. No, I don’t know your only Viet friend that you knew when you were 12 years ago. Pho is not pronounced “poe”. My family does work at a nail salon but you are not allowed to show me your nails and wink at me like I know the Secret Nail  Society, you racist ignorant ass. 
    10. “Please stop talking.”You have been talking about yourself for the last 5 minutes. Did you even breathe? If I could just make you shut every hole on your face. 

    Visuals by Lydia Hudgens 


    . March 30, 2017 .

    What I'd Rather Say To You

    . March 30, 2017 .











    If life is a serious of decisions, then I’m going to jump the gun and say that there are going to be moments when the socially right thing to do is absolutely not what you feel like doing. Scratch that. You’re going to experience it all the time. Or maybe I just do. And the older I get, I assumed that it would be easier to decide which route to take. Reality is – it doesn’t. I’ve grown cocky with my decision making skills, generally following my 68% “whatever the fuck I feel” and 32% “not my battle today” ratio. I get cocky in who I am, making it harder to be open to saying the right things to say in efforts of comfort as oppose to just saying how I really feel.

    Here are some things I would much rather say in many conversational occasions:

    1. “Wow, I really don’t care about anything that is coming out of your mouth.”We’ve all been here. I don’t know how many times I’ve been in a situation where my boss pimps me out to new potential business and I have to sit there and act like I care about what they think about the weather, their favorite shitty restaurant in NYC, what their dog looks like after the 2nd blurry photo, and pretty much anything else. 
    2. “Fuck, what’s your name again?”I suck at remembering names. And it bothers the hell out of me. 7 out of 10 times, I’m trying to rack my brain for your name while you’re telling me about that one time you ran into Rita Ora in Soho. 
    3. “I would rather eat my own feces than follow you.”Do NOT grab my phone and enter your handle and then proceed to press the follow button without exchanging more than 5 words with me first. You IG whore.
    4. “Ha, that’s funny that you think we’re going to be friends.”We have zero in common. I know you don’t like me. Don’t pretend to be my friend. And let’s just not pretend to be nice to one another either. In fact, let’s Kill Bill this bitch.
    5. “No. The answer is no.”Why is it so hard to just say NO sometimes! Like no, I don’t ever want to do brunch with you. No, I don’t want to talk to that ugly dude so you can talk to his friend. No, I don’t want this kale salad but I’m going to eat it anyway. NO!
    6. “I’m going to laugh to make you feel better but I just want to turn my ass around and walk away.”Keep your day job. You won’t succeed in improv.
    7. “What exactly do you want from me?”Let’s cut to the chase. Why are you talking to me? What exactly do you think will benefit you in our exchange? And…how do you want to use me? Bitch. 
    8. “I hate this”small talk thing we'e trying to do. 
    9. “You’re racist.”No, I am not Chinese. No, I don’t know your only Viet friend that you knew when you were 12 years ago. Pho is not pronounced “poe”. My family does work at a nail salon but you are not allowed to show me your nails and wink at me like I know the Secret Nail  Society, you racist ignorant ass. 
    10. “Please stop talking.”You have been talking about yourself for the last 5 minutes. Did you even breathe? If I could just make you shut every hole on your face. 

    Visuals by Lydia Hudgens 


    . March 27, 2017 .





    I can feel the molecules, even the space between the molecules' excitement. It moves around me, bumping clumsily against one another, giggling in my ear, rubbing against my skin. Pushing me left and right but always in the right direction. Creating magical layers around me. Bright, colorful but not one color but all colors. Kinetically calling for other energy, recruiting and persuasively tinkering. I must be the luckiest person in the world. To be around them.

    - bright molecules

    Written by Lynn Kim Do
    Visuals by Ade
    Makeup by Shideh
    Styling by Hoku 

    . March 25, 2017 .












    Sorry, I couldn't help myself. It's absolutely appropriate to wear this Novel Swim pineapple number in Puerto Rico, home of the Pina Colada. I may or may not have gotten wasted after this shoot (and had several brain freezes).

    Visuals by Pedro 

    . March 22, 2017 .









    1. The weather is absolutely perfect. It is always sunny with a constant beautiful breeze. If it rains, it’ll only last for 15 minutes. Nights are too chilly for shorts and crop tops but you won’t die. I’m so dramatic. So jeans or a sweater comes in handy, if you can fit it in your suitcase. I didn’t have that luxury.
    2. Get to Culebra by Ferry or Plane from the main island. The cheapest way to get there is to either drive or take a cab from San Juan ($90 one way ~60 min.) to Fajardo and then take a ferry to Culebra (~$4 one way). The cons of this is that it gets very packed on the weekends. Ferries open at 9am and 3pm. Lines are usually very long and it’s first come, first serve. Once you get there, you’ll have to find your way to the main beaches (10-15 min. via car) as well because you’ll be dropped off at the main dock. You can fly from San Juan International airport. It is the most convenient but also the priciest (~$150 one way). You can also leave the San Juan Airport and take a 15 min. uber ride ($6) to Isla Grande Airport for a plane ride there ($73 one way). This is the route I took. All planes to Culebra are charter-like private planes that fit 8 people. It’s FREAKING AMAZING. You get the best view from the top and they allow cell phones for images and FaceTime (although I didn’t try).
    3. There are no resorts here. Book an airbnb, guest house, or one of the more intimate hotels. It’s part of the charm. I stayed at Palmetto Guesthouse. Susan, the owner of this six room home, is very accommodating and genuinely very sweet. The space is quaint and cute. All areas of the island are very easy to reach from all hotels, airbnbs, and hotels. So you can’t really go wrong.
    4. Rent a golf cart! You MUST experience the golf cart lyfe. It is so much fun. It will also make your island trip so much more convenient. You can not walk everywhere and cabs are sparse. I literally saw two chicks try to hitchhike a ride from the airport. Don’t be those girls.
    5. Everyone speaks English and Spanish. You can use your phone endlessly (since it’s US territory). No need to exchange currency because they also use American dollars. Ahhhhh, I love PR. There are no compromises here.
    6. But bring cash monayyyyy. Most places are cash only and trust me, you don’t want to starve or god forbid, not afford a Pina Colada by the beach.
    7. Go to Flamenco Beach. No, like you need to go rn. It is one of the top ten beaches in the world for a reason! The sand is so soft that you will just melt into it the moment you touch it. The water is blue and the waves are kind to you. Off Flamenco beach are shacks that serve drinks and empanadas. Try a crab meat empanada with a frozen Pina Colada.

    8. Take a walk on the beach to the tank. Once you’re done sunbathing on Flamenco beach, take a nice long walk to the Tank sitting on the beach. It is graffiti-ed out and what’s left of American savagery and post-bombing days. Now it is a piece of tourist artifact that makes for great photo ops. And your new phone screensaver.
    9. Go Snorkeling. The coral reefs are absolutely stunning and it is so easy to snorkel off Flamenco Beach. You can purchase this deal ($35) or if you’re a pro, rent gear at a bodega/market for $5 and just go at it. Careful because my friends totally stepped on some Sea Urchins. Painful af. If you get a Sea Urchin stuck in you, you'll have to wait 6 hours before extracting it.

    10. Go to Zoni Beach. If you have time to explore one more beach, take the 15-20 min golf cart drive to Zoni Beach. But don’t tell your rental place that you went because it’s forbidden. But we’re all little badasses here…so just do it! It’s so worth it. It’s absolutely secluded and only locals tend to go here. Make a few stops along the way. You will get the best view on the way there as you stand on top of the hill overlooking the island. If you stop at the right spot, you can also see the virgin islands (13 miles from Culebra vs the 16 miles distance from San Juan).
    11. Explore other beaches to find sea turtles. Don’t limit yourself to just the two beaches I mentioned. Playa Brava apparently has sea turtles and there are so many beaches surrounding this island worth seeing!
    12. Drink: Pina Colada, Bushwacker, Frozen Passion Fruit Mojitos, and Medalla beer (duh!). Did you know that the Pina Colada was created in Puerto Rico!? Yup, fun fact. And Bushwhacker is the official Culebra island drink. Medalla is the official Puerto Rican beer. And I just really love the frozen passion fruit mojitos here.
    13. Spongebob Squarepants is located off the shore of Culebra. Culebra use to be a base for bomb testing. So they use to take large amount of household products including pans, sponges, etc and then bomb it in the ocean off the island. So…that’s how Spongebob was born. There’s also a Krusty Krab restaurant in Culebra. Hmmm, which came first?
    14. Learn Patience – food and service are slow here because they make it per order, guaranteed deliciousness. This took awhile for me to get use to. #newyorkerprobs

    15. Breakfast: Vibra Verde for Acai bowls and Egg Sandwiches. The local airport (I am so serious!!) for espressos, coffees, and simple breakfast items. Or the Tiki Grill for their breakfast menu. Yum.

    16. Lunch: Zaco Tacos for tacos…omg this place will change your life. It is only open Mon-Fri from 12pm. Nina’s for Mofongo. If you want an authentic Puerto Rican meal in Culebra, then go to Nina’s. Chances are is it Nina who is actually making your meal. Tika Grill got some bomb ass burgers.

    17. Dinner: Dinghy Dock for a fresh piece of fish. The view off the dock is phenomenal. Their appetizers are not my fave, I will have to say. But their grilled fish of the day, fried snapper, or mahi mahi is AMAZING. And you can feed your leftover bones and fish to the fishes near the dock. They’re like mini shark size and hella scary but also cool af. Don’t skip out on dessert. Their key lime pie is divine. And if it’s one thing I suggest you must do for dinner, it is to take the trip to Krusty Krab. It gets packed even at 6:30pm but the view is unreal. The sunset here is even more breathtaking. Krusty Krab is a food truck with amazing fish tacos and fancy seating, but very limited.
    18. Go Stargazing. New Yorkers don’t really look up. How can we when we can be stepping on dog shit at any second…especially in Bushwick. My friend texted me to look at the stars one late night. And as my boyfriend is knocked out with zero chances of any consciousness, I snuck out and actually looked up. My god, it will surely make you believe in a god if you don’t already. It looks out of this world (pun intended). You honestly feel like you’re in a VR world. It’s so pretty it looks fake. You’ll easily spot the Little and Big Dipper, too. I urge you to stargaze on Culebra.
    19. Bring bug spray. I have so many pesky souvenirs on my skin. I am still scratching them we we speak. I probably have Zika now.
    20. You can also do a day trip to Culebra from San Juan. Two excursion websites include East Island and Culebra Island Tour. This is how I found out about Culebra in the first place. It is well worth the trip if you can’t stay for an extended period of time. It’s worth it. Trust me!

    Visuals by Pedro 


    . March 16, 2017 .









    There are very few and rare moments in my life that I have ever felt “Wow, I fit in here.” In high school, I knew every clique and group. I knew their names and we were cordial and friendly and even Facebook friends. I didn’t hate them. They didn’t hate me. But I was never “in” any particular group. I never hung out with a group in particular or people in my high school for that matter. I didn’t really talk to them. I didn’t know anything deeper than what they wanted me to know and what I wanted them to know. At lunch, I sat with someone different every year. I was in clubs because I was told that I needed to be in one. When I joined Theater Club during my senior year, I had a passion for acting but the people in Theater Club just didn’t have quite a fondness for me. I watched them talk about things I truly did not give a shit about. Instead of pretending, I just didn’t join the conversation. I got close to a few girls that talked about things I did care about. But in high school, you can’t only like one or two people from the group. You must accept the whole thing or you’re not in it. Well, fuck that, By all means, I don’t want to deceive you. I found friends outside of high school. That took up my time. And gave me a sense of relief in the frustration I had, mainly with myself at first. I blamed myself for being so freaking weird. Maybe it was me, not them. I was a circle peg in a square world. And that feeling never left me.

    I couldn’t accept the act of pretending, so I decided that the only way to combat that feeling is to make my own groups. I was quite ambitious. And it worked out for awhile. But that also ended. Something was always missing. Something, something I couldn’t figure out for the life of me, always made it fall apart. The kind of falling that tore me into shreds, built walls around my heart, and had me jaded. It happened over and over again. Until, I couldn’t do it anymore. It wasn’t working. So I stopped. Two years ago, I decided to just deal with it. With myself. I had to stop fixing it, whatever it is.

    You know, I still feel like I don’t belong most days. But instead of actively trying to fix it, I let it happen. I find something to enjoy in the situation that is making me feel uncomfortable. And you know what, I like that fact about myself—not being able to fit in. I think that’s what my friends like about me, too.

    Life is about ideas you develop, and you challenge it. You challenge your beliefs. You accept defeat. You accept new ideas, too. You just keep going, keep searching. For the answers. For yourself.

    Shorts - One Teaspoon 


    . March 13, 2017 .









    Have you ever felt like there’s a thunderstorm right inside your chest? Not the violent kind. It’s the one you can’t decide if you despise it or if you love it. Or maybe, you don’t have any straightforward feelings towards it. You just feel it.

    It’s pouring. The kind of rain you have to turn the windshield wipers on for. The kind you’ll need more than a cap and a hoodie to escape. The kind of rain that I just can’t stop staring at. The kind of rain you get caught in. And when it catches you, you find yourself utterly alone in the middle of a Brooklyn street. Or on the driveway, just right after you get out of the car with ten bags of groceries in your hand. Or underneath a hundred trees. And you can feel the rain rhythmatically on your face, your scalp, you palm. It’s not too hot. Not too cold. And you just stand there. And you remember that this is going to suck later. But it’s great at the same time. It’s great right now.

    Visuals by Amina
    Wearing:
    Denim Dress - Farrow
    Denim - DIY






    . March 9, 2017 .










    Recently, my dreams have seem to be very preoccupied with my past. Past friends, past lovers. My first reaction was always “fuck!” My second reaction was to call them nightmares. Although I would have to admit: no one is ever stabbed to death in my dream, no spiritual entrapment, no treacheries and certainly there are no tragedies either. But I always woke up feeling anxious, uncomfortable, and…unsettle. My third reaction was, naturally, to figure out whaaaaaa the hell my mind was trying to tell me!

    My first conclusion was that I must miss them. Maybe my subconscious was trying to tell me that I was yearning for them. Maybe they’re not doing well (...can I be psychic??). I went as far as texting an old friend to see how she was doing, a friendship that went down in utter and silent flames many years ago. And the conversation had went like…
    Me: “Hey, I’ve been having dreams with you in it. I just want to make sure you’re doing okay.
    Her: “This number is not saved in my phone. Who is this?”
    …great, well, this makes me feel more shitty than relieved.
    Her: “Lynn?”
    Her: “I’m doing good. I hope you are too.”
    Okay…better than I thought. But why didn’t I feel good about that. In fact, I felt the same amount of anxiety and uncomfort that I felt in my dream. I didn’t want to fix anything. That wasn't my intention in reaching out. I didn't want to open any dialogue in hopes for more dialogue. Our friendship is broken for a reason. And time doesn’t heal the problem. It heals emotions.


    So I began to rethink the way I was trying to understand my dream. Maybe my subconscious wasn't yearning, but it was warning me. Perhaps it was showing me a fantastical alternate reality that would clearly bring nightmare associations. And perhaps, my mind was purging the past to get ready for the future. Need more room for some happiness, some good people, and some more good vibes.

    Visuals by Amy 
    Wearing:
    . March 6, 2017 .

    . March 3, 2017 .











    The title of this post is a more PG version of my lowkey freakout. What I really want to say is “WHERE THE FUCK IS THE SNOW?” I don’t want it to be 18 degrees either but if you’re going to be 18 degrees…at least make it snow! If you’re going to make me miserable and force me to pull out my thick coat after teasing me with 70 degrees a couple days before, at least make the sky light up in white flickers and let the street be coated in white.


    And if global warming is a hoax, then I am also a sheep. 

    Visuals by Thaya
    Wearing:
    Reading Silver - Daniel Wellington  (LYNNKIMDO for 15% off)